blinkin’ light pt. 1

i see u in the blinking street light

blinkin’ at me

you became my plea, the only one I need

winkin' at me

i see your wink when my abs hurt from laughing

i see your wink as I walk lightly 

and hear the faint breeze whizzing through the palm trees

i see your wink through a simple steamed hot cup of tea 

i see your wink when my friend tells me she’s been praying for me

i see your wink when those prayers have been the ones keepin’ me when all i’ve felt is weak

sometimes i gotta search like lost treasure 

other times you’re in plain sight

i see u the blinkin' street light

in the way it flickers off and on

 

in the way it changes from green to red yet remains in the same place 

hangin from a tiny piece of wire yet steady all the same

you hang in my heart, you cling to the unsteady and make it steady and safe

what i’ve learned about this light that comes to life in my life…

the paths may shift, the terrain may not look the same, but the light of the world isn’t goin' to leave me when i'm unsure which path to take

is this really what i see, blinkin' before me?

is it hope? or is it deception? tryna make me place my affection in the darkness over the light that I can clearly see? 

tryna make me comfy in the chaos? 

tryna make darkness the company i'm being colored in with? 

crayons of defeat tryna scribble away me 

but this blinkin' light above me is tellin me something else completely


your heart becoming my guide, your Word is my lamp, my light, the one I choose to look too 

tellin me when to stop n go 

tellin me when to slow my roll

My child, you can’t do this on your own

you need parameters 

you need boundaries

you need to be bound by the one who will set you free

when my heart is tired and all my fight has left  

i see u in the blinking light 

somethin’ about the way the street looks at night

these streets getting the best of me

givin me time to think 

and not think 

about all thats comin’ against me

these yellow lines helpin’ me recognize where i gotta stay in line and when it's time to leave my fight at the door and allow my Father to drive

i see u in the blinkin' light

as cars buzz past this life of mine,
I think of them…

where are they troubled?
where do they hurt?
where has life felt like the bee that never quits stinging?
where have they lost their fight? 

maybe they need this blinkin' light that keeps on lightin’ up my life

maybe they need this blinkin' light that’s the only thing that’ll put the darkness to shame and solve all their plight

maybe they need this blinkin’ light that created the stars in the skies and came down from Heaven on one starry night

let me tell you about the light that shines his eyes in every crevice you wish the light couldn't see 

because of the torment that has shown you who to be 

see, it's hard to let the light in when the darkness has become your best friend

it's hard to let people in when the last time you did others took advantage of the trust you placed in them

i'm here to tell you… every single detail he sees… including the things that keep you up at night

ask Him to come into that memory, I pray right now He'd make it alright and you'd see Jesus in that place in your mind where you've replayed the hurt too many times

to the flashback that you couldn't take back if you tried

to the helplessness of being kept in shadows of shame

to the cycles you couldn't imagine in your wildest dreams- for them to break

 

too every dark hour and every thought that plagues your mind

i speak these healing words over you - 

you were made for the fight

the struggle between darkness n light… 

straining sets the scene for the light to make its debut

the blinkin’ light wants to show you His kind eyes

arms that are open 

with a heart that is soft towards you and all the broken pieces too 

the blinkin’ light wants to convey you don't have to live in fight or flight another day

may they see you when their life feels like a trainwreck and the blinkin’ light shinin' through the rubble is all they have left

that shred of hope… may they cling to it and never look back

read the rest here (pt. 2)

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fallin’ full force (pt 2. of trying to get back to my inner child)

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blinkin’ light pt. 2